


The Lighthouse

by solarlunarxiii



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Mild Language, Shinoh-chihou | Sinnoh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 12:54:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9727682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/solarlunarxiii/pseuds/solarlunarxiii
Summary: A moment of inner reflection becomes a spark of unexpected connection.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DregranEntropy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DregranEntropy/gifts).



> Happy Valentine's Day <3

I was sitting at the lighthouse, the place where everything began, and everything usually ended. Since I was a kid growing up in this town, I always used to come here when I needed to escape from the chaos down below and just stare into the sea, daydreaming about every possibility I could find beyond the horizon of the ocean.

You know, it’s funny, for a town called Sunnyshore, things tend to seem awfully dark.

...wow, that was such a pathetic thought, what is _wrong_ with me?

Well, whatever. It’s not like feeling this hopeless is anything new. I swear, sometimes I don’t even know why I chose this career path. I always saw the Gym Leader profession as something so admirable, so professional, and above just... _fun_. But that’s not what it is. It’s always just piles upon piles of trainers and their Pokémon, one right after the other, each with a similar dream and each inevitably being met with the cold and unforgiving slice of reality that they’re just like everybody else. Nobody is really special.

Damn, there I go again, just down the pity party path.

It really wasn’t always like this. I used to be so invigorated by the work I did with Pokémon and trainers. When I first went on my journey, I was just like all of those trainers that walk through the gym doors. I believed I was going to be the best. I wanted to meet so many people and learn all kinds of new things about Pokémon. But now, meeting people just seems exhausting. All the enthusiasm becomes too much, and I’m left sitting to resign myself to my own secluded thoughts. And the worse part, is I don’t even _like_ to be alone.

But, here I am anyway. Alone. And I guess that’s fine. Nobody really comes out here anyway, besides the wild Pelipper who think there’s any chance I’m going to feed them. Luckily they’ve learned to not be very big fans of the electric-type Gym Leader.

Man, even the _birds_ don’t want to be around me.

Oh well. I’ll climb down from this hill eventually, and then go back to the gym so I can sit and wonder what I’m even doing with my life anymore. But not right now. Right now I just want a few...more…

“—Excuse me, are you Volkner?”

...Dammit. Who is that?

I look around. Standing directly behind me, wearing a big pink winter jacket, is a young trainer. I didn’t even hear her walk behind me, I was so in my head. She seems only slightly younger than me. She has long black hair, and a look in her eyes like I’m about to reassure her that the local Gym Leader _isn’t_ a huge waste of time. Unfortunately, she’s about to learn.

She looked down at me, the poor guy sitting on the grass like a toddler. I chose to look up.

“Yeah, I’m Volkner.”

“Oh...umm…”

I know what she’s about to say. She’s going to say “ _do you think you can come back to the gym and battle me?_ ” to which I’ll say “ _maybe tomorrow_ ”, and then I’ll ignore her until she goes away.

She spoke, but not the words I predicted. “Are you...okay?”

I didn’t answer. How was I supposed to answer that?

“Well…” she continued, “Do you wanna talk about it?”

Not really, but I didn’t know how to say that. I probably should have said something, but every word that came to mind was turning into sawdust.

To my horror, instead of electing to continue our conversation, she took a couple steps forward and sat down on the green grass next to me. This was the farthest I’ve ever seen a trainer go to try and get me to return to a gym. She was probably just going to ask why I wasn’t there. I want to just get up and leave.

“Umm…” she said quickly after sitting down, “Why are you out here?”

“...I like it here.”

“Why’s that?”

I just stared ahead, prompting her to do the same. The sun was now setting, and the horizon looked like a perfect watercolor painting. She let out a small gasp, apparently not noticing how great the view was.

“Wow…” she said.

Maybe now that I had her mind fixating on something else, I could just get up and leave. I think I’m going too.

“ _So…_ ”

Dammit.

“You’re the gym leader here, aren’t you?”

And there it was. The reason she came to talk to me. The reason that _anybody_ ever talked to me. Should have expected this.

“Yeah.”

She didn’t look at me. She continued to look at the sunset.

“Being a gym leader seems tough. I don’t think I could do it. Did you always want to be one?”

“Well, first I wanted to be Champion. But I settled for this.”

I hated to be so cynical, but there was no point getting up this girl’s hopes and dreams. The only person in this region who was ever going to be Champion was Cynthia, because she was the best trainer in the world, and nobody was ever going to beat her. Good luck becoming anything worthwhile while you still have someone like _her_ running about and crushing everyone’s dreams.

To my surprise, even though I wasn’t being the best of company, this girl continued to sit next to me. She obviously wasn’t one to notice subtle hints. Either that or she was just stupid.

“Being Champion is my dream...” she whispered in a plain and sweet voice. It wasn’t sad, but it wasn’t eager.

“Good luck with that,” I scoffed. I was first to admit in my mind that that was pretty rude. Oh well. That’s what I do. I push people away.

She laughed, and her expression didn’t change when she uttered with the purest of intentions, “I don’t need luck. I’m going to be the Champion.”

Sure you are.

The sun was starting to set darker, and the light from the horizon was dimming to a point where only a faint glimmer of red stretched brightly over the sea. This was my favorite part of the sunset.

I decided to make another attempt at making her go away, hoping she’d get the message that I’m not the kind of person you should enjoy a sunset with.

“Hope that attitude works for you, because it didn’t work for me. Eventually you find that person who you just can’t beat, and then you’re stuck. Forever. In a city that, in moments like these, is just...too good for you.”

She looked at me, and I knew it, but I didn’t look back. I stared blankly ahead, unwavering so unhinged that my eyes started to water.

“I’m sorry…”

“ _Don’t_ give me sympathy.”

Finally, that shut her up.

She continued to look my way, and her previously neutral expression now melted into a frown. Well, now I felt like an asshole. Oh well. I am an asshole.

She took moments to look at me, probably thinking of what she wanted to say. Then she just said, blankly, “I don’t think you’re a bad Gym Leader.”

I rolled my eyes, “Yeah, okay.”

“I mean it.”

“You’ve never even _battled me_. I’ve never even seen your face before today.”

She shook her head, and her black hair bounced around her round face, “No, I don’t need to battle you. I can tell.”

This was getting ridiculous. She didn’t know what she was talking about.

“Why?” I barked.

The girl looked down and pondered. I really didn’t want to have this conversation right now, but apparently it was happening.

She looked back at me, her eyes fixated on mine, and without a single wrinkle of doubt in her complexion. “Because...you care. And you want to do a good job. And you’re up here.”

I said nothing. She kept going.

“I came up here because I wasn’t really in a good mood either. I actually just loss a battle earlier— _horribly_ _—_ it wasn’t even against Gym Leader, it was some kid younger than me who swept me entire team with a perfectly trained Tyranitar he got from his brother. And now I just feel like...nothing.”

Why would someone like her be just as upset as I am? That doesn’t make any sense.

“You can’t let one battle define how you are as a trainer,” I said out of instinct, “People win and lose everyday. The important thing is that you tried your best, and you don’t have any regrets. And if you do, so what, that’s just life. You get up and you move on.”

She looked at me with the most satisfied smile I’ve ever seen in my life. It didn’t register immediately at first, but I had just given myself my own advice. And she knew it. _Dammit_.

“I mean…” I stuttered, “It’s different with me, I just, I…”

 _Fuck_. Really? Did she just come here to do this on purpose? I really didn’t want to talk about this, but... _fuck_. She was right. No, _I_ was right, that’s the worst part.

“I think…” she spoke, startling me. “I think that you’re a pretty good gym leader. And you shouldn’t doubt yourself.”

I interject immediately, “But how is sitting up here feeling sorry for myself supposed to make me a great trainer? It just makes me a whining loser. And I hate being that.”

“I disagree.”

Adjusting her position in the grass, she changed her pose so that her legs were stretched outwards as she leaned backwards with her hands pressed into the ground. She looked up at the clouds that were beginning to fade from view from the setting of the night sky. There was even a single star visible.

“There’s nothing wrong with being critical of yourself. If every trainer in this world thought they were the best thing since sliced bread, they’d never get anywhere. And then they’d all give up. But you don’t want to give up, do you?”

Truthfully, I did. But I mean, _now_ I didn’t. Or maybe I did. I don’t know anymore, this was all too frustrating.

She yawned and layed down completely on the grass, “Maybe, whenever you’re feeling up to it, we actually could battle. But we don’t have to.”

I rolled over, leaning over her and staring her directly in the eye. It felt easier to do now that I was about to get up and leave. I was exhausted of this conversation.

I looked down at her and whispered, “That’s not going to happen, but nice try. Good luck being Champion.”

I stood up quickly and started to walk away. I knew if this conversation progressed any further I’d just end up becoming angry, and I didn’t want to do that. For some reason, she had this idea about me that I was something that I really wasn’t. She was welcome to continue thinking that, but I didn’t want to be there when she found out that I wasn’t the wonderful trainer she thought I was. And I wasn’t about to battle her, crush her spirit, and deal with the aftermath.

But, not only a couple steps after I’d gotten away and headed towards the stairs down the lighthouse hill, I heard her.

“Wait—”

I could have kept walking. I really could have. But I didn’t.

“I…” she stuttered, now shuffling to her feet as well, “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to upset you. We don’t have to battle. I don’t want a gym badge, I just…”

“You WHAT?” I yelled louder than I should have, “What do you want? Why are you wasting your time with me? WHY?!”

Everything went mute, and I couldn’t hear anything. Not even the Wingull echoing obnoxiously in the sky above us. I just stared her down.

“Because…”

She took a couple steps forward to seperate the distance between us.

“...Because I...I’ve never looked at the sunset with anybody else before. At least...nobody who does it for the same reason I do.”

I exhausted a laugh, and looked way, finding her ignorance to be hilarious. “You actually have _no idea_ why I’m here. And if you did, I don’t think you’d still be talking to me. So maybe you should back off before you get hurt.”

Then, not even 2 seconds later, she said something that I don’t think I’m ever going to forget. She just said…

“No.”

I turned around and started to walk away again. This time I wasn’t met with more yelling, I only heard frantic footsteps. She was running. What, was she going to chase me?

Before I could step any further, there she was, standing in front of me. And this time, _she_ was the one with the angry expression.

I rolled my eyes, “Great, now what do you—”

...and she kissed me.

It didn’t last long. Our lips met for only a second, and then she pulled away instantly. It happened too fast for me to even process how I felt about it. But in my gut reaction, I wasn’t angry.

She looked me dead in the eye, and spoke once more in a clean yet adamant voice, “I hope you don’t give up on yourself. Because I won’t.”

I wanted to say something, but she didn’t let me.

“—My name is Dawn, by the way.”

She turned away and started running down the stairs. Before I could even formulate a response, she was already gone. She’d left just as quickly as she came.

I looked back at the ocean. The sunset was over, and the day was now coated in a shimmer of dusk. Of all the times I’d come to this hill to ponder my thoughts, this was the first time I’d ever actually felt like smiling.

Funny, how Dawn came at dusk.


End file.
